Archive for December, 2009

How To Prevent Shyness In Children

How To Prevent Shyness In Children

Like all other character traits, shyness begins at a young age in children. Left on their own, the children might bring this trait over to adulthood. In many cases, however, shyness can be prevented with the timely intervention of parents and family.

Here are some tips that parents can do to wrest shyness away from their children.

Modeling confidence

Shy parents often have shy children. Parents, consciously or otherwise, stand as models for their children. They should show their children how they interact and express themselves with confidence with other people.

Social skills

Children need to be taught social skills at a very young age. Parents should teach their children how to behave in social situations (saying thank you and please, introducing oneself, etc.) and how to make friends and keep them. It is good to praise them when they show correct social behaviors.

Effective communications

Communicating with others is a very important skill to impart to children. It develops their self-esteem and builds their confidence. Parents should teach them how to express themselves to be understood by others.

Again, parents can set themselves as models on how to communicate confidently. Like always, children learn by example.

Social exposures

Exposing children to varied social situations can polish their personalities. Parents can start having them interact with children their age (schools and play groups) as well as letting them meet up with adults.

Decision-making

Parents can manipulate some situations to make their children feel capable. One way is encouraging them to make decisions (like what they want to wear given a choice of clothes).

Another is giving them chores that are challenging but well within their abilities. (Young girls can be encouraged to help prepare tables or food for cooking, etc.) In all instances, parents should always be there for guidance and help.

Appropriate discipline

The right weight of discipline gives foundation to children?s lives. It allows them to learn acceptable behaviors and those that are not. It helps teach them what to expect from their parents and everyone, and this gives them the feeling of security.

Excessive discipline, however, can swing the wrong way. Severe punishment in the name of discipline tells children they have no control of their lives, and this might result in shyness.

Love and affection

Unconditional love and affection for your children gives them security and confidence. Show them, tell them in words, and give it all in action that you love them no matter what. This assurance of affection is one big factor that boosts self-esteem in children.

Trust

One big cause of shyness in children is mistrust of others. Parents should work hard to create a trusting relationship with their children. This trusting relationship has to be nurtured with consistency, honesty and openness so the children would know what to expect.

Inconsistent behavior, broken promises, lies, withheld information ? these things destroy trust, and consequently, a child?s self-esteem. They will become secretive themselves and shyness sets in.

Basically, all these tips can be a big help in nurturing your children away from being shy and leading them into becoming confident personalities who can express themselves. Self-confidence has degrees like shyness has degrees, too. You would know how to prevent shyness in your children when you see it.

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Dealing With Shyness Through Self-Motivation

Dealing With Shyness Through Self-Motivation

Shyness is one of the hardest issues that a person must deal with. This is because fighting shyness would require an overall assessment of one’s self?among others?to become successful

Experts say that one of the easiest ways to start dealing with shyness is through self-motivation. Indeed, motivation keeps people moving. This is one thing that helps them achieve goals that they have set for themselves. However, not all people are able to motivate themselves easily. There are those that who rely or depend on other people or experiences just to keep them going. Although getting motivation from other people or experiences might work, it is best if one learns how to motivate himself or herself on their own.

Getting started

Motivating one’s self is a process where one needs lots of reflection and self-assessment. These are very important in dealing with shyness because it will help the person to know what are his or her strengths as well as his or her weaknesses. If one knows of his or her strengths, that person will be able to continue what he or she is doing and even enhance it.

On the other hand, knowing one’s weaknesses is as equally as important because through this, the person will know what the areas he or she should improve on. If one knows his or her weaknesses, he or she might be able to deal with shyness easily and can even turn these into opportunities that will make him or her successful in the future.

If you are one of those who would want to get started on self-motivation to deal with shyness, the first thing that you need to set your mind into it. By having a mindset that you would want to get started on self-motivation and stick with it until you are successful, you will be inspired to overcome the feelings and hesitations you have. Setting your mind into something will help you look forward to the results of what you are aiming for. For you to have a proper mindset, it is best to clear your mind from negative thoughts so you can think clearly. Once you have done this, you will have an idea where to start with self-motivation.

The next best thing to do is to start with small and simple tasks in dealing with shyness. Overcoming shyness might be easy for some but for others, this is a very difficult feat to achieve. For people who feel that starting with self-motivation to deal with shyness, this can be overwhelming. So, the best way is to start with small and simple goals to achieve. If one starts small and simple, he or she will be able to accomplish these goals the easier and faster way. If simple goals are set and achieved this early, you will be able to earn self-confidence that you will need in facing greater and bigger challenges ahead of you.

Experts agree that self-motivation is a very important factor for people who are aiming to overcome shyness for good. This is also important because it gives the person a sense of freedom in choosing paths that he or she has to take. Through self-motivation, people are given the chance to maneuver or control their own lives which in the future will help them be the best persons that they want to be.

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How To Help A Friend In Overcoming Shyness

How To Help A Friend In Overcoming Shyness

Shyness is one of those issues that are hard to deal with alone. This is why it is important for shy people to have friends help them in overcoming this issue.

If you know a friend who is at risk or who already have fears in dealing with others, you can help him or her to overcome that. What you can do is to act as a confidante during conversations as often as possible. Since he or she trusts you, you can try to explain to your friend that although the fears of untoward incidents may happen when dealing with others, these don?t take place all the time.

Acting as the confidante

If your friend is in crowd, it would be best if you accompany him or her so your friend can have somebody to turn to once the nervousness gripping his or her senses. If you are in the same social event with a friend who is trying to overcome shyness, here are some of the things that you can do:

- Familiarize yourself about shyness. If you have time, you can do this research by surfing various sites in the Internet. If it is possible for you to research with him or her, it would be better because here, information about shyness and studies or statistics as well as various relaxation techniques is taught to help people understand the shyness itself.

- Make sure that you know the people who are attending a specific social gathering. Knowing details about the people who are attending the party might seem an extra effort for you but you have to do this because your friend will rely on you during the gathering. You can check from party organizer event details and you will know what to tell your friend. The information and your presence will help your friend be more comfortable and relaxed knowing that she or he doesn?t have to worry about anything anymore.

- Keep your friend distracted. Since your friend is shy, it is only natural for him or her to feel nervousness and even physical symptoms such as dizziness, muscle tensions, deep breathing and even vomiting if placed in a crowd that triggers shyness. If you see one or two of these symptoms, you should start distracting her or him by talking to her about things that are light. If you do this, you can veer him or her away from negative thoughts.

- Stop him or her from consuming stimulants. Some of these are taken by people who are extremely shy to calm them down. These stimulants may include sugar, coffee and other drinks that may contain alcohol. Tell your friend that it would be best not to take these since they contain ingredients that may increase the symptoms of anxiety as well as panic attacks.

- Make sure that you both arrive in the gathering early. One of most effective ways of helping a friend in overcoming shyness is getting at the party venue at least an hour before it starts. By doing this, you can buy more time to relax and just enjoy the event. It is best not to go there late because it will only cause a feeling of rush that may trigger anxiety that causes shyness.

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Using Meditation Through Music

Using Meditation Through Music

Clearing your mind through meditation is one of the most peaceful ways you can find to just relieve all the tension you have in your body. Once your mind and body are relaxed you can start to just enjoy some time to yourself. I know that most of us listen to the radio at some point of the day. You may enjoy music ranging from country,to easy listening,to disco,soft rock,classic country,or even blue grass.

Whatever kind of music you enjoy you can find this as a very relaxing way of meditation. For a lot of you that are in good physical shape and like to exercise in a gym at home or even by jogging you want to be able to free your mind of a lot of things that have bothered you through the day.If you are out and about doing your exercises take a Walkman with you and just put it on a station that you really like and let the music just relax all of your tension.

If you are at home exercising or even cooking or cleaning if you have a CD player get one of your favorite Cd’s and play it while you are doing the things you need to do.You can also just go get some blank tapes and record your favorite music off the radio for your meditation. One of the things I find relaxing is listening to music while I am working on the computer.

I have found free sites such as lime wire and frost wire and have taken the time to download my all time favorite songs. I transfer the songs I enjoy into my windows media player and play my music everyday when I am on the computer. I just quietly sing along to my favorite music relax and just meditate about my day. I actually use my keyboard a lot and have to do a lot of typing about different subjects. I have found that if I am not completely relaxed and my mind clear I will make many mistakes in my work which I can’t afford to do.

I know I need to be completely relaxed so I pull up my windows media player and play my most favorite songs that will help me to use mediation to get my work done. I have also bought some blank Cd’s and burned my favorite songs and then listen to that CD while working on the computer or even going somewhere in my car. After having a busy long hard day and I know I still have to drive home and start my routine of cooking,helping kids with homework,giving the kids a bath and getting them to bed.

As soon as I get in my car and I think about all the things I will have to do I put my CD in the player clear my mind and relax and meditate. After I get all my work done I put the kids to bed and the house is very quiet I will draw me a hot bubble bath and listen to my music and just clear my mind and gather my thoughts so I then can start the next day with a clear head.

So whether you enjoy meditating by exercising,shopping,or listening to your favorite music you will find once you have released all of your tension you can then start to feel good about yourself and when you feel good about yourself you can then feel good about your life.

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Stop Smoking Through Meditation

Stop Smoking Through Meditation

Both self-help groups and clinics offer the quit smoking support programs. Most of these programs are run by professionals and can be customized to meet your needs. You can either attend an intensive quit smoking support program that runs for a week to fifteen days or enroll yourself for weekly sessions.
The popularity of the quit smoking support programs is mainly due to the extensive counseling that they provide to smokers. They teach you to deal with withdrawal symptoms. Meditation can help.

They also provide you support and guidance at every step by understanding your problems. You can talk with the counselors even after you have finished the program. This can help prevent a relapse.
Besides counseling, most quit smoking support programs also prescribe nicotine replacement therapy or NRT. Some also suggest medication like Zyban. Meditation is that experience where one?s consciousness becomes engrossed and merged with the object of meditation.
You can also choose from alternative treatments like hypnosis procedures, acupressure and meditation though these are often not very successful. Do what works best to help you to stop smoking, that is what is so very important.

Zyban creates a false feeling of pleasure in the person, a feeling that is similar to the one experienced while smoking. This drug should be taken strictly under medical supervision. It has a few side effects associated with it, and should be avoided by people suffering from heart disease, epilepsy and pregnant women.Beginning with the toes on your left foot, tense the muscles in those toes for a count of three, then slowly release the tension in the toes, and feel a calm return to the toe area. You need support during this difficult time so please talk with someone about it who can provide you with that help.

Do the same with the toes on the right foot.
Since the chances of a relapse are very high, most quit smoking support programs have a 24-hour help line service where counselors listen to queries and provide solutions. At the end of a program the smokers are given listening and reading material to reinforce their resolve to quit smoking.
Quit smoking support can also be extended by friends and family members. They can play a big role in keeping their friend or relative occupied. They can also help in preventing relapse by urging the smokers to return to the quit smoking support program if the need arises.

The advantage with NRT is that it reduces your craving for nicotine. You can use NRT in the form of gums, patches, sprays and inhalers. Though gums and patches are available over the counter other forms of NRT can be taken only under medical supervision. They reduce your nicotine dependency by releasing a small quantity of nicotine into the body. The dosage can be regulated to control the withdrawal symptoms, and stopped completely once your urge to smoke disappears.
Meditation can help.Good luck on your way to a new fresh non smoking world, you are really going to love it.

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